Chinese Immigrants' Kids - Culture Clash

On yesterday's segment of NPR's All Things Considered, they had a story titled Chinese Immigrants' Kids Play Balancing Role. The story discussed the tension that arises from American children and their traditional Chinese parents.

The parents come to the U.S. in hopes their children will get a better education and a better chance of success. With it though, their fears of losing them to the American cultural norms are high since those norms are very different than what they feel is proper or even what they feel is common. The parents even lose the ability to speak with their children in many cases.

"Because of the loss of the language and also because of the more authoritarian parenting, there isn't as much of a close parent-child relationship in the way that we think about it in the United States," says Professor Vivian Louie of Harvard University.

The professor also says these problems with their parents can cause the kid to have high rates of depression, suicide, and mental health issues. On a positive note though, the immigrants' children have really good work ethic and set high standards for themselves.

I loved this story because I could relate so well. I know my parents sacrificed a lot to give my siblings and I a far better life than what they could have provided had they stayed in China and as I have gotten older, I have learned to really appreciate that. However, I am definitely one for fighting with my parents on a regular basis. I always say I feel like I am lost in translation when trying to explain an event, my feelings, or anything of importance. Then I get very frustrated with them, which causes us to clash.

I think my parents have transitioned really well with giving my brother, sister, and I a well balanced Chinese and American life. I can speak the language, I eat all the strange foods, and I know when to be that respectful, dutiful daughter. I also always brought home great grades and was an outstanding student because they instilled that responsibility in me. But they still let us go out with our friends and I got to party a lot in high school.

I am sad for them that none of us became the doctor or lawyer they probably wanted, but none of us are bad kids and we all have a decent relationship with them. I think my brother calls them at least once a week from California and I'm sure my sister talks to my mom a lot. I love my parents and I'm thankful that they worked so hard their whole lives so that I could be blessed. That doesn't mean I'll stop fighting with them though. :)

I didn't mean to make this such a long post. At any rate, to hear the story or read the transcript, click here.